literature

Poetic Greed

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By
Bytebullet
Published:
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Literature Text

To longer lasting
partners
Oh, listen to those blissful
numbers
The greenbacks win with their
fists full of pain
-
You squeal, you tremble
While you live in your 'box'
on Maple
Do you know what it takes
to become
successful?
The fourth in the series of free verse poems based on the seven deadly sins. This poem I created while I was listening to "Until the End" by Breaking Benjamin. Had the idea that the sin greed would be best reflected in an organization similar to the mafia, hence the lines "To longer lasting partners" and "greenbacks...fists of pain"

Hope you like it!
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Comments13
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winterkate's avatar
winterkate
Hmm..... This is an interesting concept. It has a unique sort of rhythm, which I like - half-reminiscent of a Breaking Benjamin/Linkin Park song, so that's good. You have excellent imagery. I love that. The ending is brilliant too. The beginning lost me for a minute there. I think in the first line of the second stanza, you have You capitalized once too often. I get it if you want to do a God parallel - that would actually be really cool and interesting - but it's not capitalized again anywhere else. Just pointing it out.
Nice work!